Insomnia

As I lay here looking out of my bedroom window I start to gaze at the neon lights that adorn the buildings, the cars that are going up and down the highway, the cars going through the toll gate going to their destination, and the mountains that seem so close, but yet so far away. I have been up for 36 hours now and I not tired yet. I am literally forcing myself to go to sleep after I finish this blog, but most likely I will just lay here looking out the window and thinking.

Well, what will I be thinking about? I am glad you asked...lol Seriously, I am looking at the mountain and I kinda feel like that mountain. It looks so close to me, but it is not within my reach I have to go through some things to get to it, but once I go through those things I learn about myself and learn from those trials. I look at it and I don't know what to expect because far away it looks so peaceful and serene, but the closer you get to it you start to see all of it's imperfection like, the wear and tear of the beauty that once was because people have taken advantage of it and neglected to handle it with care. It is not until now that people are concerned about it and wanting to restore this beautiful landscape to it's original condition.

I am looking at it and I am thinking about my life the things that I have gone through, the people who have hurt me, the lessons I have learned, the opportunities that I have been given, the moves I will make, and where God is taking me and the things I have not yet to see or could ever even imagine, the places I will go or the people I will meet. Only time will tell, but I am ready for what is for me. This is the first time in my adult life where I can say that I am truly happy because I don't have anyone trying to hold me back or hold me down. This year I will experience alot of first's for instance this is the first year that I have ever been single, moved overseas, left my family and friends for 1 year, teaching English, and much more, but most importantly I am finally happy and it is an amazing feeling, indescribable.

Now I wonder if could be this happy when God blesses me with a husband...to tell you the truth at this point in my life I am content/happy with being single for the rest of my life...that was so random, but anyway..the whole point of this blog was that I can not sleep and was just laying here thinking about life...lol

Like Tom Hanks said in Forrest Gump, "Life is Like a Box of Chocolate, you never know what you are gonna get.."

Until next time...

Love God, Love Life, & Love Yourself because if you don't then who will?

~N.